The worlds oldest football club Sheffield FC, last night beat the Italian team ASD Pro Appio in the Anglo-Italian International Trophy. The score however could not be agreed on with the referee counting 12 goals to nil, both linesman counting 11 goals to no reply and Jerry the ground announcer claiming ''To be honest I got in late, some kids told me I missed 4 goals but I don't know if they're tricking me or not!?!....I only saw 8!?!''.
The match organisers decided to use 'average' system to work out the correct score for the first time in the sports history, with Sheffield being credited with the victory by 10.33 goals to nil. Man of the match Steve Woolley scored 3.33 goals and spoke with our reporter. ''Appio gave us a good game, a score of 10.33 nil looks on paper like it was one sided but It wasn't like that at all''.
The Italians suffered a number of injuries to take with them back to Rome, goalkeeper Emiliano Musico was taken off at half time with a bruised ego following the conceding of 4 goals in the first 3 minutes!, midfielder Andrea Cifani walked of the pitch on 53 minutes claiming ''We were told we were coming to Sheffield Utd and Bramall Lane.......look at this dump!!......its not worth it....I'm shooting off back to my Mama's!'', and striker Manolo Teodori 'popping' his newly fitted gastric band following a half time meat pie!.
The home team took pity on the visitors going into the final 10 minutes, by dangling the carrot of giving them a goal of they could get over the halfway line....sadly this only brought more nerves into the players heads and they scored the worlds first own goal penalty!.
Info supplied by DC
MATCH STATS
Sheffield----Pro Appio
Goals 10.33 ---- 0
Shots 124 ---- 0
On Target 12.33 ---- 0
Possession 99% ---- 1%
Yellow Cards 0 ---- 0
Red Cards 0 ---- 0
Retirements 0 ---- 15
Best Player and Match Rating
Steve Woolley (Sheffield) 9
Giorgio Turini (Pro Appio) -5
The match organisers decided to use 'average' system to work out the correct score for the first time in the sports history, with Sheffield being credited with the victory by 10.33 goals to nil. Man of the match Steve Woolley scored 3.33 goals and spoke with our reporter. ''Appio gave us a good game, a score of 10.33 nil looks on paper like it was one sided but It wasn't like that at all''.
The Italians suffered a number of injuries to take with them back to Rome, goalkeeper Emiliano Musico was taken off at half time with a bruised ego following the conceding of 4 goals in the first 3 minutes!, midfielder Andrea Cifani walked of the pitch on 53 minutes claiming ''We were told we were coming to Sheffield Utd and Bramall Lane.......look at this dump!!......its not worth it....I'm shooting off back to my Mama's!'', and striker Manolo Teodori 'popping' his newly fitted gastric band following a half time meat pie!.
The home team took pity on the visitors going into the final 10 minutes, by dangling the carrot of giving them a goal of they could get over the halfway line....sadly this only brought more nerves into the players heads and they scored the worlds first own goal penalty!.
Info supplied by DC
MATCH STATS
Sheffield----Pro Appio
Goals 10.33 ---- 0
Shots 124 ---- 0
On Target 12.33 ---- 0
Possession 99% ---- 1%
Yellow Cards 0 ---- 0
Red Cards 0 ---- 0
Retirements 0 ---- 15
Best Player and Match Rating
Steve Woolley (Sheffield) 9
Giorgio Turini (Pro Appio) -5
Hey CDH,
ReplyDeleteThe Italien's performance improved enormously in the second-hald, particularly after they borrowed the Sheffield goalie to give him some shot practice, although I heard afterwards in club bar that he too had ruptured an hernia picking the ball out of the back of the net so often.
Great match report by the way...I counted 19 goals, but some may have been disallowed for offside.. can't be sure as I was too busy getting a bovril for the Sheffield Goalie(he looked very cold and I'm surprised he wasn't subbed for an additional outfield player.
All the best
DC